Listening?

"To listen closely and reply well is the highest perfection we are able to attain in the art of conversation."  -unknown author

Listening.

 It's been a problem for a long time and I've been trying to work on it. I know that a lot of husbands have this issue. Some guys are too busy thinking about other things or simply just don't care what their wives/girlfriends have to say.

 Listening requires effort.

I found some helpful tips from this site:

http://www.askmen.com/dating/curtsmith_60/63_dating_advice.html

In order to avoid the temptation of wandering off into your own little world, stay alert to what the person has to say and focus in on their message.

  Instead of trying to think of a rebuttal while your spouse is talking, use this spare time to try and understand their ideas, complaints or feedback.

If you find that you can't hear your spouse properly or you're finding it hard to focus on the message, try to reduce or eliminate the distractions: turn off the television, close the window, lower the music, or move to a quieter area.

It's important for us to listen to them and validate what they are saying. They want to know that we hear them as well as listen to them. Yes there is a difference.

When they are talking, let them know that you are listening to them by looking at them, eye contact is key. Use body language too. When they are talking to you, if possible turn your body towards them to show you are giving them your undivided attention. Nod your head or use facial expressions, don't just sit there with a blank face or stare out the window. That's just rude.

Even if it's something you don't really care about, just  know that it's important to her or she wouldn't be talking about it. And take the initiative to ask her about her day or how she's doing. That will show that you really care about them and their feelings. They need to know that they can talk about anything to us and that we won't criticize them or make them feel like we don't care.

Like I said, this is a problem for me and I'm doing what I can to work on it.

What will you do?